TURN 1 - Player Count
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Whose turn is it anyways excited to announce the Devon board game weekend at the Fox and Hounds Hotel in Edgesford
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near Exat. This event begins on Friday the 17th of October to Sunday the 19th of October. For more details on how to
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get tickets, follow the link in our show notes and we'll love to get a game with you there.
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[Music]
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Welcome to Whose Turn It Anyway, your board gaming podcast where we talk about all things cardboard and board gaming.
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And we've got here on the episode today, we have Davey. Hello. We have Adrian. I'm warm
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and Rob. Hi. And we are absolutely roasting our nuts off in in this dining room recording
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studio cuz it is literally the hottest day of the year today. Right. So far. So far. Yeah. far and will be tomorrow
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the hottest. It's hot in the UK. What's going on? Yeah. What? We're not used to this. No air con and sweaty.
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It's just no way getting out of it, is there? That's the problem. It's going to be high levels of delirium over this episode.
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Like if if you're next to a pool with a cocktail in hand, this would be great. Yeah. But unfortunately,
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you're recording a podcast. Yeah. Yeah. So, it's a little bit different. And true to form, we're roasting in
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here. And this episode is all about roasting board games. So, more about that later. But how is everyone doing
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generally apart from the heat? I mean Dave is like dressed up in full vest.
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I'm not dressed up. I'm dressed down. You're dressed down in a proper Yeah. I've got a vest and shorts and shorts. Vest and shorts. It is vest and shorts
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weather, right? It is. I'm just jealous. Yeah. It's I've got a lot of vests at home from living in South America.
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That's how I dealt with it is just wear very little. So So we don't strip off halfway through
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the episode. Yeah. Great. Well, I said I would have come in my pants and vest, but if it was allowed, but it didn't really seem
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I mean, the listeners won't know. No, listeners won't know, right? Should we move on to the next segment?
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Yeah. I mean, yeah.
TURN 2 - Let's Talk About Hex
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And we're here now with the next segment, which is Let's Talk About Hex, where we talk about all things that we can get into the table. So, Rob, I'm
Rob - Carcassonne
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coming to you first, my friend. Okay. Uh, what have you been playing? Well, we we had a little trip uh to the
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USA. I told the guys last episode recently and I I I got to play the latest hotness.
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Not sure if you're aware of it because it's so, you know, it's so super secret. Secret Scroll Club
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Gallerist. It's a brand new game called um Tapestry. Is it Tapestry? It's a brand new game called Carazon.
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Oh, not heard of it. Not sure if you're aware of this game, but it's the latest hotness. What is it? Um, it's a tile placement
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game. M uh where you have to build roads and castles and stuff.
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Farms and farms. No, we didn't play farms. What? You didn't play farms? I gave him the basic basic.
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Okay. Yeah. We went to the board game calf uh cafe. Um and the we didn't kind of know
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what to play and I saw Caras on there and JP said, "Yeah, played it for a while." So, we busted out and it was a
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really nice chill game. I really enjoyed it. It was It was cool. It is. Yeah. I
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can see why people still why why it's been around for so long. It's just it was a chill game. It was a perfect way
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to kind of start our day playing ball games to be honest. So, it was nice and
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chill. Um I'm sure most people have played it. Yes. Most people know what it is.
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But yeah, I really enjoyed it. I thought it was great. You should play with farmers. Yeah. Definitely because it's like 90% of
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You're holding your tongue for that for so long. Yeah. I I just I get it's the basics. So farmers lie down in fields and it's
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basically area control. Well, we played a copy which
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it didn't look it didn't look legit, did it? The print didn't line up. Yeah. Oh, mine's I had a I've got a copy.
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[ __ ] Sum, right? Yeah. So, we were like, well, we don't know. We don't know what's in here, so we'll
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just do base it. First game was great. I Yeah. Just just play easy and then if
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you want to like play again, but we didn't play other stuff. But yeah, I agree. Farmers, you should play. I've still got the big bag somewhere
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at home, I think, cuz I do enjoy it. Our family still play now and again. Yeah.
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Yeah. My group plays it as the if no one can really decide what they want to play. Quite often we'll put carcass on
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out while we talk about what we're going to play next cuz it's did you play? You can pick up
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at the end of your turn and look or at the start of your turn and look. Well, cuz there was only two of us. If
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he we just picked it up and looked picked up when Okay. Because the official rules are at the start of your turn you draw a timer.
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We did it after I think. But a lot of people will do it after and it can be a bit of contention around that.
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We did it after always just cuz it's takes so long otherwise. Like if you do it afterwards, you can be thinking about
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your piece as it goes round. Right. Yeah. Which is why a lot of people do that. But I'm pretty sure the rules is written is at the start of your turn
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draw a tile. I think it is. Yeah. But but why does it matter from a rule point of view in this
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game? Certain amount of tiles as well, right? So you can't influence anything from it.
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No. So you pick the tile up and you you can look at it and someone else at the end of your turn someone
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else is having a go. And then you can go, well, I can go there. Or they put their tile down, you go, oh yeah, but he
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can go there. But either way, you can't influence what they're putting down. I mean, you can cuz you can just point
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out when they go, I don't know where else to go. Oh, you can go over here. Okay. You can be a dick. Yeah. Yeah. That's what that's like 90% of the car
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is on, isn't it? I thought But but generally, yes. Yeah. Yeah.
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There's no rule in there that kind of gets in the way. No, there's not. It's just people. It's just as well. As you know, I've
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flipped tables previously for Carcasson, so we all know how I treat that game. But yeah, I just got one more question. Would you get it though?
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Uh, probably not. I know. It's a game that my family would play and I wouldn't play on my own.
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Yeah. obvious reasons. Yeah, I don't think you can play on your own. Yeah. Getting in my own way. Oh, you
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What are you going to do? What's the nicest city I can make from these tiles? So pretty. So pretty.
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No, I enjoyed it. I I'd play it again. Yeah. Cool. Okay, cool. What about you, Davey? Uh, so I played and I suppose I spoke
Davey - Endeavor Deep Sea
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about this recently, but I've been playing more of the recents. We were meant to play Arcs. Yes.
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So I probably could have spoke about that, but that got cancelled. Um, boo. So, we ended up playing um, Endeavor
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Deep Sea. Spoke about it before. Uh, it's JP's first time. First proper game.
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Yeah, first proper game. Um, how did you find it? I enjoyed it. I mean, I I cabbage
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myself. Um, but apart from that, that's just me being a knob. And I cocked a rule up for [ __ ] up.
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We ended up doing um campaign uh or campaign six, I guess, the
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mission six. mission six. Um, and it had quite the most unique set of rules I've
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seen yet. Um, so you usually put objective stars out and you keep putting them out to
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fill the objective board up. This time you just had to like move them around and then there was a fallen star that
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you had to go and find before you could put more stars out. Yeah. Um, and it really changed the game up in
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quite a positive way. But one of the endgame scoring, you had to kind of do it as you went, which was very different
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to uh all of the other missions. So, we kind of messed that up. So, we didn't score goal two. But other than that,
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but I had fun. I had fun. It was cool. Just pushing some buttons really cuz I I played the demo at Essen, which I
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enjoyed. But I think you you absolutely loved it cuz obviously you went on and got a copy from America, I think, didn't
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you? Yeah, I did. Uh pretty much soon as you got back from from last year, so but no. Yeah, really good to get a first game. I'd like to
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play some more um and play it properly. Yeah, it kind of it sits the midweight
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game, but has a real nice decision space and it has a lot of variability with
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what mission you're doing, what tiles are coming out, um what uh staff you end
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up hiring, which give you the actions. So, even though it kind of is a midweight game, there's still a nice
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amount of decision space there. And yeah, it just kind of and it's so pretty. It keeps pulling you back in,
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right? Yeah, it is gorgeous. Like when you have the the tiles that are there from depth
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one to to five and then, you know, by the end of the game, you've you've kind of explored all
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of the sea and it's Yeah, it just looks really nice. Like it I know it sounds
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obvious, but the flow of color from top to bottom from like you know like a rich blue to pretty much black at the bottom
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and it's just all the different things going on. And we didn't see obviously all of the tiles so you don't see them all every time. Um but yeah, cool. Some
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cool little mechanics in there as well with um what was it that wanderer probe droney thing that you can send around
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and yeah, so it's a mini expansion. Um it's an expansion. Yeah, it's like a mini expansion, I think, with the
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Kickstarter, but it's a little wanderer deep sea probe that when your vessel's there and you can basically
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act as if you're on the spot, it is your your sub. So, you can do it action and
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get bonus like bonus buffs from where the where the other sub is. That sounds good. Yeah, it's cool. Um, orcas, orcas also
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came out, which are cool, which just spend it as a conservation rather than normal science. So, well, you're releasing the orcas, right?
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Yeah, you're sacrificing them. You're sacrificing them. you're it's meant to be you're going out and releasing them into the wild, right? So,
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we're not hunting them cuz we're not hunting them. It's all about preservation. It's all about preservation rather than cuz the previous endeavor was all about
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uh pirate ships, I think, or like um naval warfare during the pirating era.
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So, at the end there was this like loads of loads of fights and it used to
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apparently be really swingy. So, this is kind of more cooperative in the sense of
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no one's fighting each other, but you still get each other's way by doing by taking up all the spaces on the the
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tile. Um, and little benefits that sometimes help each other, right? So, if you if two of you
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do an action, which is like either journaling, sonar, or um
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or conservation, sometimes there's little links, and if you've done one and
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um one of the opposite players does another and the links in between it, you both get the effect. Whereas, if you do it yourself, you only get it once.
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Yeah. So, it kind of sometimes incentivizes you to split out and do different links.
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Yeah. It's cool. I enjoy it. I was I was really happy to play again because I've kickstarted it and I was like, you know when you play a game and you really
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enjoy it and you're like, "Oh, was it as good as I remember?" Yeah, it was. It was great. So, Rob, you kickstart. I thought you
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wasn't going to do kickstarting games anymore. Move on. Did you get the expansion as well?
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I did. Yeah, cuz the expansion I think is just more tiles, which is kind of some maybe some more crew,
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which is kind of what you want. You just want more variability. Yeah, it's fine, isn't it? Yeah. I'm intrigued to try more different missions
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because I've only played the first one, but the core concept is great. So, if the if the missions just add a little
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twist for me, that's perfect. They're quite big twist from Yeah. from what we played yesterday. The game
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completely different. Not the game's the game's the same, obviously. Mechanically, it's the same. Mechan, but um but the the kind of what
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you're what you're going for and kind of what you're trying to build to is completely different from kind of
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mission to mission. Interesting. Yeah. All the scoring didn't happen if you didn't find the falling star. So, it kind of got to a point where you're just
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like, "Right, we need to kind of dive down and sonar down to find your goal was to find this fallen star."
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Is this one of the later missions? I.e. is the expectation that you've kind of you know what you're doing by this point. Yeah. You're not going to jump in at
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six, are you? You're probably Yeah, you're probably going to do like one, two, or three to start with. Probably.
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That was me being selfish just cuz I I was like, I don't want to play mission one again. I played it too many times now. And JP kind of Usually, you're fine
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with it. So, you were like, "Yeah, let's go." And kind of what you cocked up wasn't anything to do with the mission
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in the end. Just silly. Yeah. Yeah. I bet it was easily done. It's new game. So silly silly decisions.
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Yeah. Cool. No, loved it. It's fun. Cool. Sub sub. Adrian. Well, I nearly signed up for that.
Adrian - Project L
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Okay. And decided not to cuz I went kax shopping.
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Kalak shop. You as in you were looking which kax to get or you actually purchased it? I purchased. You went and got it?
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Yeah. cuz my dining room where I'm going to have all the new stuff is different and I can't fit what I had before. So,
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new Callaxes, but that's not what I'm going to talk about. I'm going to talk about a game that I've played a few times before, but got it recently to the
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table. I don't think we've talked about it, and that's Project L. Been out a few years now. In fact, has a
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couple of expansions that I've not played. But the the basic premise I I've always said it's Tetris, like tabletop
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Tetris. Yeah. what you you have two levels of um like puzzles and each puzzle is a little
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dual layer board that's got like a polyomino random shape in it. And then
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in the top lefthand corner it might have some points and in the top right it will tell you when you've completed that
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shape what piece you'll get as a reward. And there's two stacks, one of which
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give you like bigger pieces but have fewer points and the other and they're normally easier to fill. And then the
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other one's worth more, but they're normally harder to fill and give you crappy little pieces basically. So at the start of the game, you get one
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little yellow piece, which is a one one square piece, and you get a green piece, which is like a 2x one. And on your
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turn, you get four actions. Your the three main action, the three sort of basic actions is you have draw a puzzle
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and just put it in front of you. You can have up to four puzzles in front of you. So quite often you'll do a couple of those a turn. You can gain a new single
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piece. So level one piece, a little yellow square. You can upgrade one piece to the next level. So each level is how
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many squares they are. So think of Tetris, you've got one square, two square, three square shapes sort of
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thing. They're all slightly different. Um, so those are your sort of I suppose base actions. The other action is a
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master action which can only be done once per turn, which is place a piece in every of your puzzles in front of you.
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But you can only do that once per turn. And so really what you're trying to do is get four puzzles in front of you and do that at least once and then do the
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master turn at least once. So you're putting out as many pieces with one action and being efficient. And then once you've put all these pieces in and
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they filled that shape that's inside this little this little card, then it goes to one side. You get all your
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original pieces back plus the new piece. And so you sort of slowly over the game build up a pile of like little Tetris
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little polyomino pieces. So, it's like kind of like you're fulfilling contracts, but but then you get a thing
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more and you get the original stuff you put into the puzzle back. I like that. And then, as I say, towards sort of, I
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suppose, about 2/ird of the way in, maybe halfway through, you'll start and step up to these bigger ones that give you lesser pieces, but you've already
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got a little stack of stuff that you're going to be putting in. And of course, because it's all these different shapes and you can't have any empty squares in
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there. It's about making the most efficient use of those polyominos inside those shapes. And it it's really easy to
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teach. It's a it's a nice quick swift game. But there is some there's some multiplayer.
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Yeah. Is it? So I've played it solo, but it is multiplayer. You're kind of going round and taking like a turn each
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sort of thing with with four actions in each turn. And then you are kind of building up and and there's a bit of a
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there's a couple of bits with this. First of all, you need to be careful with which bits you're placing. Sometimes you might take a master action. It says you may place one in
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each. So you might decide to miss one out cuz you haven't got the right piece for it, but you need that piece for elsewhere and stuff like that. So there's little decisions like that, but
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there's also a really fundamental sort of point where you have to shift from doing the the smaller puzzles which
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are worth almost no points. They're worth like 0, one or two to the bigger puzzles which give you smaller pieces.
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So they're not great for the engine building, but they give you three, four, five. And so there's a point where one
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person quite often will go and suddenly everyone will go and start and do the big puzzles because they don't want to be left behind. So even if they're not
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quite in the right place or they haven't quite got the right pieces, they kind of feel like they have to
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follow you. And so that there's that sort of weird tipping point which is oddly sort of strategic.
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Yeah. in its nature for such a simple basic because I thought there's only a few plays in this but I've had a few
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games and I'd still want to play more because each time there's only maybe two three points difference in it. Um at the
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very end in case you like to sort of not get left behind at the very end you can place any pieces you have remaining but
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every time you place a piece it's minus one point. Yeah. So you might need to place two pieces to
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fulfill a five point contract sort of thing. So, that's only worth three
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because you've placed two at the very end to fulfill it. And yeah, it's a great production. Um, I
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remember looking at it at Kickstarter. And I had a funny feeling it said that those little boards aren't dual layer in
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weren't going to be dual layer in retail. And I remember thinking that's going to be tough. Now, I don't know whether they changed their mind or
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that's just me misremembering it, but when it obviously it's still got those dual layer boards in retail. The pieces themselves are lovely little tactile
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plastic pieces all in the different sort of tetrisy colors that it looks very like that sort of thing. So, you know,
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they're all yellows, greens, orange, purples, that kind of thing. And yeah, it's just it's a really nice
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tactile, simple, quick to teach game, but there is that little bit of puzzle in there like stuff like that. It's got
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that little bit of something in it. Yeah. To keep you coming back to it. And again, at some point, I might consider
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picking up one of the expansions. At the moment, I don't feel the need for it. It's a bit like Baron Park sort of thing. I feel like I enjoy the puzzle
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as it is currently and maybe one day I'd pick it up. But when you get to the point where you're bored of it, that's that's the ideal
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time to get something like that, isn't it? If you want to continue playing it or is it
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that's straight away, isn't it? If it's got an expansion, you must have it. I've always got them from launch as well, but I can see the point in in
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Adrian's more sensible than the rest of us. Well, some games, you're right. Some games it's like, well, Kickstarter, back it all in, do everything big box and
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everything. it makes sense. But with this one, because it's I think it was cost me like 1617 pound for this base
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game and it it does the job of being a nice quick turnover simple to teach
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everyone can get involved kind of puzzly game. If you like a if you like that sort of
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uh what's the term spatial puzzle? If you like the spatial puzzle idea, then
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it's great. Like I think it'd be great for you and the family, for instance. I think it's got that it will give them that idea of what an engine builder is.
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I'm more intrigued by it now that you've explained it cuz I've know about this game and I was like but now now I kind
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of get what the mechanisms are and how it builds on itself. I'm like actually that's quite cool and that's why I wanted to talk about it
19:01
cuz I played it solo and thought first. So one one grid con I got left with a load of Paul's games cuz he couldn't
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take them home with him. So and that was one of them and I said I'm just going to pop out a few of these games and play
19:12
them solo and I thought I don't actually know what I want to play solo. So project hell solo mode. Yeah, give it a go. It was fun, but I was like, I need
19:19
to see how this plays multiplayer. And it's really good multiplayer, and it does does just the job that you want it to do.
19:25
I always thought it was going to be a solo game whenever I've seen it as well. And I don't know why I've not ever looked into it more, but I don't know.
19:32
For me, the Tetris style, I couldn't really fathom how it would work multiplayer. But
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yeah, it's it's an engine builder. It's a very basic spatial engine builder puzzle. And I think that like you like
19:43
both of you, I kind of misunderstood it when I originally looked at it. I looked at kickstarting it and I kept talking
19:48
myself out of it cuz I was like how good is this going to be sort of thing and that's why I wanted to talk about it cuz I've played some other
19:54
games like what not between podcasts we're very close close together but I have played some other games recently
19:59
and I thought actually no I want to give project a bit of bit of love bit of love cuz I think
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should be project W right WV what
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project wave project win rather than project lose right oh that's what you
20:16
Yeah, I'm younger than you guys. You can tell by Jesus Christ. Yeah, you're not like 21. It's not that
20:23
it's not that much of a difference. He's just younger at heart. The rest of us all beaten down and miserable
20:29
commodins. I don't believe it. Victor Mel is our idol. Um and Davey's
20:37
like, "Who?" I'm not that young.
20:42
No, it sounds good, man. We just get a game that sounds I think it's great. I think it's great convention game material as well. So,
20:49
I'll bring it to the next set of conventions we do. Nice. Cool. Um, for me quite a while
JP - Tabletop Inc
20:55
back now, but me and Stuart had a game of tabletop ink. Used to be called
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Meeple Inc. I think back in the day before the controversy of you can't use Meeple, trademark, all of that lovely
21:07
stuff. Tabletop Inc. is um a game that's probably the most meta board game I've
21:13
played. It's a game about designing games, isn't it? It's a game about designing games, board games. Um and with the expansion, which
21:20
we played, there's a convention and you you basically promote your games
21:25
at conventions and get people to play them. It's very meta. So, production-wise, this game's really
21:31
good. It comes with a Calax shelf mini one. Um, it comes with the board game
21:37
little mini teeny weeny boxes that has kind of alternate art of the games you
21:44
already know. So, it's like, oh, Dracula game, we know what that is. And there's uh there's kind of other ones there.
21:51
Zombie one, all of the usual tropes are there. So, yeah, you kind of got little mini boxes. Um,
21:57
in the in the in the while we've got Rob, I kind of did a similar thing to what Rob did, which is I confused at one
22:03
point my shelfie Yes, which also has like a callax unit and dice that you're supposed to kind of use
22:08
to fill up the Calax unit with table. I kept going, I'm sure I've seen this released recently. And uh yeah, turned out they were two
22:15
different games. Completely different. Yeah, Rob. So, the whole point of it is that you you've kind of got um you got a set of
22:22
meatballs that you would uh basically use as workers. No, no difference there.
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But you have a board game table where you have um specialists that that sit
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around that table. So you and you can hire more more specialist like a little mini table as well.
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He's a little mini table, hexagonal table and uh obviously six sides. You can put
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six specialist around there and they've all got different abilities and and things that they can help you. So you start the game with like uh being able
22:53
to only like do a level one in components or mechanisms. So you can only ever produce like up to a level one
22:59
game. Um and then you can kind of investment more people, more designers and then level up your your um skills,
23:06
shall we say, to then do better bigger and better games. Um and and that's
23:12
pretty much the the the game. like you you get the box, you get the components, you get the mechanisms and you're
23:17
literally putting them in the box and you put the lid on the box and then and
23:22
then you publish it and then you um basically uh put it onto the KAC shelf
23:28
and then that gives you kind of certain points depending on the level of the game and all sorts of different things.
23:33
Um and yeah, and it's just worker placement at its heart really. you you you pull all your workers out when
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you're kind of done or you want to um reclaim your workers, you can uh re
23:45
basically pull them all back and there's like a little marker on the VP track which goes backwards which is like your
23:52
timer in the game. So how many people you pull back. So if it's six then obviously that goes six spaces backwards
23:58
and if it lands on a if it lands on a certain icon then you'll get that bonus.
24:03
Um, so sometimes it's worth it, but you're then pushing the timer towards the end of the game. And and it also had
24:09
this has this kind of weird mechanic of you can kind of guess what people are
24:15
going for when you do that pull back action. You can kind of like bet on what
24:21
they say, I'm think you're going to go to this action space and that action space during your next round. Um, and if
24:27
you do then I get some VPs for for that which is not quite seen in it. It's kind of strange. Um, and yeah,
24:36
it's a game. I I thought it was okay. It seems too unrealistic for me.
24:42
It's It's I could see people having fun with it. It's not for me. It's not
24:49
enough depth for me. You're like an engine. It's just a bit
24:54
Yeah, this might sound harsh, but it just sounds a bit one note. It's kind of like you you it reminded me of Lords of
25:00
War Deep where I'm going in, I'm doing the thing to get the other thing to then
25:05
do the thing and then I restart and do the thing again. And it's like I'm just fulfilling a contract over and over
25:12
again and just for me it wasn't enough going on. But I could totally see other people
25:17
enjoying it. Lesser people. No, not lesser people. just just uh just
25:22
people who don't want heavier games and actually just want something a bit of fun and production on it is great, but I
25:28
would say the uh the board there's two sides to the board. We played on the mat, but one side of the board's like a
25:34
more straightforward functional design and the other one is a bit more like artwork going everywhere. I think it's
25:41
not as clean as it could be cuz even I was like, "What the hell?" Like there's so much going on on that board. The
25:47
background's got kind of a mix of meeples and real life humans interacting because I think the point is meeples are
25:53
a real thing living in a world with humans and they're making games together. I don't quite know what was
25:58
going on. What? Yeah, exactly. It's like what? Um, and it's just that the board is just
26:04
full of like meeples and humans just working in a factory, but then there's like worker placement spots everywhere and it's just quite hard to see. It's
26:11
just kind of weird. You have to see it. You have to look it up. Um, it sounds like what would have been cool though is if the game you make the the certain
26:18
type of action of that game that you're making gave you a little bene benefit for that game type. So if you make a
26:26
little worker placement one when you place your worker you get a little bonus or something. It's kind of generic mechanisms, generic
26:31
component. They're just generic tokens that you get. But they missed the trick. Yeah, just I don't know. It's just for
26:37
me it's just not not my kind of speed. But um but yeah, I think people enjoy it
26:43
um who just want a bit of a lighter game, should we say? Okay. So, it's more like um the lower
26:49
end to midway. Correct. Yeah. So, lighter end. If it sounds interesting, check it out
26:54
cuz I think there's there's definitely an audience for it. Um but yeah, all I can say really.
27:00
Yeah. There you go. Cool. Well, that's it. That's Let's talk about Hex and uh let's move on to the next segment.
TURN 3 - Main Event: The board game roast
27:07
[Music]
27:16
And now we're in the main section where we're going to do a bit of a board game roast. So if you've ever seen the celebrity roast um kind of things they
27:23
do online or episodes or what where they get a celebrity and everyone just takes the piss out of them and themselves and
27:29
each other, that's kind of what you can expect. So, we've all picked two games
27:34
each that we adore individually, and I don't think everyone will adore everyone's games. That probably makes it
27:39
a bit easier to roast them. Um, but we've all picked two games, but I think the caveat warning right at the start of
27:46
this is that this is just a bit of a laugh. It's a bit of fun. And we're going to roast our own games that we love, which I think it's going to be
27:52
quite difficult, but we're going to give it a go. Um, and yeah, we're just going to have a bit of a bit of a chat and a
27:57
bit of a laugh about it. That's kind of the It's kind of the vibe really. And it's hot and everyone's kind of
28:04
spitting facts. So spitting facts. Um while roast while while roasting
28:11
it's all good. Tattoo on the line. Tattoo on the line. I don't know. Yeah. On the knuckle.
28:16
Right up to the knuckle. It was We are roasting. It's bloody hot. It is warm. And I do have to say we we do actually
28:23
have the doors and windows open. Uh, I should have said this at the start, but so you might hear some ambient noises
28:28
like bees and dogs and crap. You might hear the odd noise of your neighbor saying, "Shut up." as well
28:34
while we're talking. Stop podcasting. Stop podcasting. You're too funny, Davey.
28:40
Uh, so yeah. So, just be aware of that. I like how you threw that on to me as well. That was, "Oh, you're too funny,
28:47
Davey." It's cuz I was looking at you. That's all it was. That's all it was. take his eyes off you all session.
28:54
It's because of that vest. It's because of the vest, man. You should You should know not to
28:59
maintain eye contact during a roast. It's not. So, I think we should start with Dave.
Roasting Gaia Project
29:06
Yeah. I'm going to start with one of your games. Going to put it up to the pedestal in the middle of the room. Right. Yeah. So, what is
29:11
So, it's going to fly in. It's going to fly in. Guess the game. It's Guia Project.
29:16
Wingspan. Oh, wingspan. No, Guia Project. Come down in our spaceships. Yeah. Gia Project. We're roasting project.
29:22
We're roasting Gia project. Too easy. Yeah, I know. There's so many Gaia that you have to Guia project to then create
29:30
the Gaia planet and then spend your GIA bits, right? I I think you should find the rule book and find that paragraph of
29:38
the rules to read it out cuz it's so ridiculous. This is my only experience of this game was listening to you guys
29:44
read the rule book out loud at a convention and just being like what on earth are you talking about? It's like
29:51
it's like you know when somebody like substitutes a word in word. So you type a word and it comes up as something
29:57
else. It was like you had the verbal version of that where everyone had replaced a certain word with gia cuz
30:04
gaia and this and ga ga and I need the gia to do the gia to move the ga to create the gaia. And I'm like, what on
30:10
earth is going on over there? And that is my only experience with this game. And it was the funniest conversation I've ever listened in in my life.
30:16
We did crack up like we were rule checking the the GIA process because
30:22
it's it's not straightforward in GIA project or at least it the rule book doesn't make it out straight to be straightforward. When when you get your
30:28
head around it, it's not too bad. But we were like, oh, we can't remember how to do it. got the rule book out and I pre
30:35
pretty much said Gia project like 20 times. So this is the GIA roast from the Guyia
30:40
rule book. This is going to read out some GUIA rules legitimately in the GIA project rule
30:46
book. All right, I'm going to read it verbatim. Okay, if you have a Gia former on a
30:53
transdin planet, place a Gia planet token on the planet. From now on, that planet counts as a Gia planet. The Guyia
30:58
remains on the Gaia planet until you build a mine on that planet. for further details about a guy projects I found on
31:03
page 12. Just like it's not a guy, it's not a guy on page 12. Yeah. Yeah, it should be.
31:09
And here's the other thing is that you go to page 12 and then it tells you to go to page 24 and then it tells your own
31:15
adventure adventure. Yeah, cuz this is what the hell. It's like it's like this game was mugging us off.
31:21
Yeah. Suddenly I was in a book of goosebumps where just like oh what's going on?
31:27
Yeah. Um but Gia Gaia project what a game. Um, the thing I'd like to roast
31:32
about Guia Project is is the artwork on the Guyia Project and the fact that when you look at the the aliens, you get
31:39
excited to play. Yes. Space sci-fi game Terrammystica but in space. I'm down for
31:44
that. And then you get the bloody boards out with the aliens on, you go, "What the hell is this?" You get your guy cubes
31:49
and you get the guy cubes with a little corner missing out. Oh, no. What are they called? They're the G GIC QC qic
31:56
QIC. I mean quantum quantum isn't it integrated? I love how in any sci-fi game if you think
32:02
you there has to be a quantum in there regardless of what is it doesn't matter. Quantum something something. Yeah.
32:09
Quantum Gia cube. That's what it is. But that's the best component in the game. It is where they've just cut a bit
32:15
corner off a cube. Yeah. They didn't have to do it. They could have just been a flat cube. Well, I mean they didn't do anything else. They didn't do good box art or
32:22
true or or any kind of design. So yeah, they had they had plenty of time to go and sit sit and cut corners off cubes cuz
32:28
they saved on all of that design time. I feel bad for the artist a little bit cuz always rag on it. And I'd imagine if
32:34
I did that and everyone snagged it off, you'd just be like, but I'm surprised I didn't sell it in a Tesco bag today, right?
32:42
What value? Oh, do you want to buy some guy project? You got your Tesco bag out and you like as the basics version of a of a board
32:48
game in a way. But yeah, it's it's just they look weird. They look odd and I'm
32:54
not I'm not down for it. But you're right, the components I mean terraforming Mars is about the
33:00
same level of production, isn't it? It's You know what? It's not far off, is it? It's not far off.
33:06
It's not far off. That's That's I've not thought about that. Clip art and uh
33:11
clip art and shy cubes. Cubes that where the the coating rubs off of it. Yeah, that's it's about the
33:16
same production value, is To be fair, they do look like they were they created by the same guy that made Microsoft
33:22
Assistant. Clippy. Clippy. Yeah. Time Clippy's come up. Oh, Clippy's making a resurgence. It's
33:28
called Copilot. So, um Ah, he's just you're not seeing the the
33:33
paper. He's not seeing Clippy anymore. He's just in the background. He's still there. It looks like you're after an AI prompt.
33:40
Yeah. Can I help you? It looks like you've been a lazy bastard. Can I help? He always looked really happy back in the day. Now I imagine him just like a
33:46
like a Wizard of Oz like behind the curtain. Just grumpy as hell. Like the middle-aged guy. Yeah. All these people want everything
33:53
from me. I don't get anything. I want to get his grief. He's got three three clippy kids that are just draining him like every week.
33:59
It's just draining him. Just Yeah. This changed. What we talking about? Go project.
34:05
And he named them all Guia. It's just ugly. I I could I could bang
34:11
on about it being ugly for good 10 15 minutes if we really wanted to fill air time. I like an ugly spreadsheet. I'm
34:16
one of these people that likes when people haven't done all the formatting on the spreadsheet. It's just a wall of numbers and even I found no lines. No.
34:22
Yeah. No, nothing. And like I don't I don't mind that bastard. I can I can deal with that, right? I know. I know.
34:27
Don't even bold the header. Changed changed changed your view of me, didn't it? That statement. And yet even I looked at Guia and went I
34:34
don't know if I can be bothered with that. So, it tells you tells you how rough guy looks from a board game perspective. Am I getting really confused? But I I
34:41
can just see a lot of green in my head. Is that right with the artwork? It's cuz I'm speaking to a green mic. Is this
34:46
guy project? Yeah, you are confused cuz it's mainly black. It's mainly black. Space. Oh, so God knows what
34:52
space. There is there are some green planets which are the Gaia planets which you see a lot of
34:58
which you put the guy people which you have to use tokens to the gymer. Yeah, the Gia former to create the Gia planet.
35:05
But we we've probably said Gia too much and people No, I don't think we've said it anywhere near enough. No, we haven't. Well, the rule books
35:12
already done that for us, right? Yeah, fair enough. Um, don't know what else to say about it. I think it's probably probably be Elon Musk's favorite game, right?
35:19
Well, space mining. Space mining. Yeah, we're going to work on space mines one day. So, yeah, might as well get used to it. Fair enough. Well, let's space miners.
35:27
Let's leave leave Guyia Project off the roasting tin or whatever and put some
35:32
other game in the roasting tin. Adrian, what are you putting in the roasting tin? I'm going to put in possibly the most
Roasting Pandemic
35:39
insensitive game of recent times, which is Pandemic. Oh, I mean game based on COVID. So,
35:46
yeah, it's true. That's co the board game. Well, yeah, it's about as insensitive as releasing a movie called The Two Towers
35:52
after 2001, really. Is it? It's that kind of level of insensitivity that really sort of 28 board games later, isn't it?
35:58
Pandemic. So, how many are in the series anyway, right? I mean, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Millions.
36:04
There are It's about about an outbreak as well, like 28 days later, right? Yeah. The game is the virus itself.
36:10
The game is the virus itself. Spreading. Yeah. It's spreading. It feels like a virus every time I play it. Feel like I've got a cold or
36:16
something. Yeah. Heavy head. Yeah. I wish you would have a cold and then you would turn up.
36:22
I'm not cold. Isn't Pandemic the most Why is it turning into a race of me?
36:27
We're allowed to roast each other. That's part That's part of the deal. It's part of the deal. Um, but isn't Pandemic the the the game that's most
36:34
likely to breed the alpha gamer? It is. It's the one always here. Alpha Alpha Gamer, not Alpha Gamer.
36:39
This is more references to 28 Days Later as well. Right. I've not seen 28 Days Later. I'm the alpha zombies.
36:44
Oh, 28 Days. Yes. I was thinking the years. It's probably It's in 28 years now. 28 Dresses. That was one of them.
36:51
28. 27 Dresses. Oh, was it 27 dresses? Catherine the week before. Oh, okay.
36:57
This is going weird. This is going weird. Is the alpha zombies actually re are relevant though, Adrien?
37:04
You know what? I haven't seen that film for so long. 27 Dresses. No. Yeah, that's true. That one. And
37:10
that was a film. Dreadful Katherine High. Yeah. She's always the bridesmaid. Oh, okay. 27 times. Yeah.
37:16
Never the bride. Yeah. Just like pandemic. It's a wrong call. anywhere.
37:21
But yes, Pandemic is the perfect game for four people to sit down, one person play it, and three people watch them play it. It's It's the perfect game if
37:28
that's what you want. I love it. It's why you like it, isn't it? It is. I play everyone's turns. My family might really enjoy that. They
37:34
might actually sit down with me and play. Just tell me what to do and I'll do it. We put the guy on the guy.
37:42
Yeah. Not Guy Project. God know they wouldn't like that one. Um but yeah, I mean, is it is it true that still base
37:47
pandemic? Yep. the the characters you have. Are they still those shitty porns? Yes.
37:53
I mean I mean they're glossy ones now. Oh, they glossy. Oh, well done. Yeah. So, they've actually put a bit of
37:58
production into that then. More production than Guy Project. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Has it really? Has it though? Really? Really?
38:05
Just about. Just about. Yeah. What's the best component out of Pandemic? Not that I'm trying to get you to defend
38:11
the game. Probably the pawns. The the glossy porn. The glossy pawns.
38:16
That's the best. I mean, it's got some artwork that actually looks like what it's supposed to be. Yeah. One sneeze away from ruining
38:22
everything as well, cuz there's no double layer boards or anything either, is there? No, you don't need that. You don't really need it, though.
38:28
That's cuz there's nothing in the game, right? Oh, topical. It's true. Yeah.
38:33
This I mean, what is it? You draw a card and then you'll go, "Oh, do we need to do this thing?" Yeah.
38:39
Yeah. Oh, no. There's an outbreak in Chicago. Let's go over and sort it out. Oh, no. I
38:45
can't cuz Sydney. Oh, I've got one action to do this. Oh, you're going to play my action for me. Great.
38:53
I tell you a lot of fun with this. Oh, I hate it. If you really want, you can then do
38:59
exactly the same for 17 more games. Yes, many.
39:04
It's not that many. I think there's 12, 11, I'm going to say. So, you because you got Right. Okay. So,
39:09
you got base pandemic with two maybe three expansions. Yeah. Then you had Iberia.
39:15
Yes. Uh, you had Oh, hold on. You've got Call of Cthulhu one. You have um the
39:21
slap some themes onto it. You have Rising Tide. What's that one? I think that's the one about defending
39:29
flatlands in Norway in World War II or whatever it is. Something something weird. It's the one I've never played.
39:36
So, you got that one as well. Um Co Chronicles. You then have um you then have the one
39:42
where you play the virus, which isn't really a pandemic game. It just has the license on it. And then you also have Rapid Response, which is also not really
39:47
one of the games that one and that was bad. It is generally bad as well. That's not um You then have uh Oh, you have World
39:54
of Warcraft. You have Star Wars. Now you have Lord of the Rings. Yeah,
40:00
I'm definitely missing some. Oh, you've got um you've got the Rome one. Yeah, I remember the Rome one.
40:06
Fall of Rome. Fall of Rome. Yeah, just not done a black plague one as well.
40:12
Like why are they doing the fall of Rome? They haven't done Spanish flu like
40:19
it's getting close calling. You know what though? We we give wingspan finsspan a lot of [ __ ]
40:25
don't we? Oh f Oh, bloody hell's fish. Well, what was you running out of ideas? It's pandemic just churning out theme
40:32
after they did that over 30 years or whatever. So, it's allowable. That is
40:37
If you can keep If you can keep churning out the same board game every sort of three years, then you're on something, aren't you? I I got I got the uh the
40:44
meme equivalent of Homer Simpson just going back into the hedge while everyone's moaning about Finn's fan just
40:50
being mful and they're just like kind of disappearing. Uh we'll just be quiet over here in our pandemic corner once we churn out the
40:56
next iteration of the Simpsons pandemic game or whatever the next one is.
41:02
Yeah, who knows? Keep doing it, doesn't it? I mean, they're all roughly similar as well. Like you do not need to play more
41:08
than maybe there's like three core versions and then all of them have got spin-offs off of those three core
41:14
versions. I think they should make one where basically you play some a board game creator trying to get rid of Pandemic as
41:20
it's coming out. It's being like no there's an outbreak over here.
41:25
Get rid of it. I play that. I quite like that. That's good. That'll be the final one when completely
41:33
out of ideas. It's the pandemic of pandemic. Tabletop Ink, a pandemic system. Yeah,
41:39
that would work. That would be funny. And to be honest, I'd respect it more for that tongue and cheek kind of attitude to it.
41:44
That's fair. That's fair. All right, it's pandemic then. Were you happy taking a piss out of that? Yeah.
41:49
Good. That's good. Yeah, I enjoyed that. That's fantastic. Yeah, you need to do it sometime. I feel I feel cooler. I don't know why.
41:55
Maybe I've got some my body. Yeah, that's it. Some anger's left me. The virus.
42:00
It's the virus. That's gone. Let's move over then. I I'm going to put
Roasting Too Many Bones
42:06
in into the roasting tin/ pedestal. Um my favorite. I like how it was a pedestal to start.
42:13
It's been sinking down into a tin. It's got hot. Yeah. It's so hot. We can't touch this. The bin lid.
42:18
The bin lid. That is I'm going to put too many bones right in the middle of it. Oh, too many bones. Too many bones. Yeah. And I'm going to
42:25
put my love on the the shelf for a minute and say, "What the [ __ ] It's so
42:30
expensive. Too many gear locks. Yes, there there are two really good lots. The the main thing is you need a
42:37
second mortgage for this game. Yeah, you need a second mortgage to to collect it all and then you need a second and a third
42:42
mortgage for the box to put it all in as well. Yeah, you do. And it's a lot when you
42:49
think about it. It's a lot, isn't it? It is a grand for a board game. It's probably the most overproduced
42:55
board game that doesn't look it. Yeah. Yeah. cuz every other dungeon crawler looks more produced of all like
43:01
all the high-end ones with all the miniatures looks more produced, costs less than Too Many Bones. And yet you
43:07
can still clearly say Too Many Bones is just way too overproduced. Yeah. People that own it like the 1% in
43:13
board games as well, aren't they? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. The rich.
43:18
Who's that? The Bezos of the board game. Yeah. Just got stupid stupid purchases.
43:25
That's it. Oh, I'm just going to buy this magnet which helps me open this game cuz it's so heavy.
43:31
No, don't need any of it. Don't need any of it. It's ridiculous. You know what? You know what else you don't need that's in that game?
43:37
All that flavor text you're never going to read. Flavor. What flavor text is on every card? Doesn't it have a thing
43:42
you're supposed to read and no one reads it? Everyone just everyone's just like, "Yeah, whatever." Right. We're playing a game of some description.
43:48
That's only because it's been going on for like eight hours at this point. You can't actually read the blurb anymore. You're like, "Welcome to day. We're off
43:55
fun. Oh, [ __ ] this. Right. So, we got to What you want to do? Do you want to fight or do you wanna Do you want What do you want to do? And you're like,
44:00
"Well, what's that? Well, fighting does this. This does this." Right. We'll pick a And you're right. Cuz you just can't be
44:05
If they hadn't spent all that time wasted time writing flavor text, they could have produced at least another six
44:11
gear locks. At least. Maybe another eight. Yeah. My issues with the cost of each gear lock.
44:16
30 for a gear lock is a lot of money. They also look like Smurfs. Yeah. You've always had a problem with
44:22
the way they look. They look like Smurfs. [ __ ] Oh, you Which one are you playing? I'm playing Smurfett today.
44:27
Smurf. Smurf A. Smurf A. Yeah. Yeah. Riding a pig.
44:34
Doing the stair. Doing the stair. Yeah. So, no. I I I think Yeah. It's
44:40
It's just It's audacious. When you get it, you get the neoprene mats.
44:45
Yeah. Do you get is it has it got is it like a board where you get to punch out all the spaces in the neoprene mats?
44:50
No. Oh, like you could rob you of that. You could have sewn together a lovely little wet suit out of all the bits
44:56
you'd have to put together for that, wouldn't you? You you get you get the game and then you go, "Oh, like me, I like punching
45:03
games out." And you get it and you're like, "Oh, it's it's all it's all there." And the only thing you do is
45:08
that damn you for being and you have to um overproduced. Yeah. You you have to kind of unwrap the
45:15
chips which are in a tube usually and that they [ __ ] go everywhere cuz that's just what happens. But yeah,
45:21
you're like, "Oh, it's just there, isn't it?" And I can just put it away in my lovely tro chest that I didn't have yet,
45:26
but then I went on and bought it for another£100 or so. Um, yeah, it's gone up now.
45:32
Keeps going on. It's like veganism, isn't it? Everyone who's owned Too Many Bones likes talking
45:37
about how much they Too Many Bones. Oh, I don't like talking about how much it is. Not really.
45:42
It's the wrong equivalent. It's people who have read Lord of the uh people who have read um Twilight.
45:47
Game of Thrones. Oh, Game of Thrones. How do you know if someone's tell Game of Thrones? I'll tell you about it. I'll tell you about it. Have you heard about our board game in
45:53
Savior? Too many bones. I do love it. Also, I like to go CrossFiting at the weekend and I've got an air fryer.
46:01
My air fryer. So, yeah. Too many bones. But you're right. The game goes on too long. Too
46:06
many groans. And for me, there's too many This is going to sound weird. There's too many symbols. Like when you get your sheet
46:12
and you're like, "Oh, what what does this do?" So you you've got your grid and you're like, "I want to get that skill, but I don't actually know what
46:17
that skill is." is and you look at the sheet and you're like, "Oh my god, what you could do it is it's the kind of static equivalent
46:24
of giving someone an epileptic fit." Like just look at what I've got to look
46:29
away before I pass out. It's mental. What you need is a bit of flavor text for each character just so you know what
46:35
kind of character you're getting into. That's what you really need, isn't it? Is just a bit more flavor text. Yeah. You want you want to be reading
46:41
two sides of A4 before you start playing so you have any hope of knowing what the ho is supposed to It's not going to be
46:47
A4. It be a scroll. We all know their production. It will literally be a scroll scroll.
46:53
Attached to a man who will read it like a town cry. Here ye here ye. I have Pickicket. And
47:00
Pickicket's main ability. Shield wall. So, who the [ __ ] is playing this in the bath, right? Who the [ __ ] is playing this out in the
47:06
wet? Why is it waterproof? So they can pump pump up the cost. Oh, so they It's so that when you after
47:11
you buy it and your tears are dripping from your face onto the into the game
47:17
that it won't ruin it. Exactly. They think it's so that when you die,
47:22
it will still exist and it'll just be passed down to
47:28
generation to generation and it'll still be as good as it was. I do actually I can understand it cuz most people that own it do think they're
47:34
like pharaohs of gods so we'll want to be buried with it. So it makes sense, right? They've probably previously learned
47:39
generational wealth. So that's what they're doing is they're just passing on down another expensive thing to them.
47:47
I love I love how you're like saying how expensive this is when your next game comes up, baby.
47:54
It's all right. It's all good. But I I It's a It's what we're going to be doing. We're going to be roasting. We roasted it. I'm I'm going to be
48:00
I don't believe half the things I've said. It's fine. I think you should cut my body up when I pass into small bits so they can go into
48:06
the little tiny drawers in the in the trove chest. Wrap you in neoprene. Just Yeah. I thought you meant to sell off your
48:12
body parts so you could recoup the cost. No, I still need them. I still need
48:17
them. But yeah, we could drop you in the seat cuz it still be all right. We can make a little treasure trove.
48:22
You might be waterproof, but the game is so I don't think the trove chest is waterproof though.
48:27
We should test it. Like Jamanji where it washes up on a forest.
48:34
What's that? It's just JP knocking trying to get out. He said Jamanji, not EastEnders, right?
48:40
Douff Duffs. My Duff Duffs. If If you think about it logically,
48:45
you wouldn't you wouldn't do it. I mean, they've made a pop-up book for this game. Have you Have you seen the pop-up
48:50
book? I have seen the pop-up book. They've made a pop-up book. I don't think they produce it anymore.
48:55
It's so you can lure more people in to play the game with you. Come on, look at this pop-up book. And you play and you open it up and you
49:01
go, "Right, we're in the fair." And there's a fair that pops up. And now you do a scenario that's in the fair and you think, "What have I bought?
49:08
Why have I bought this thing? And really all it is is pi pip of [ __ ] isn't it?
49:13
This is like eight chips and a boss. But I've got a pop-up book and it's
49:19
cool, right? It's cool. Yeah, it's cool. Pop-up books are cool. Yeah, we're nerds, mate. Nothing we do is cool.
49:24
There we go. It is. It's nice. Oh, cool. That that race then you have to do that, Rob.
49:30
Yeah. Oh, you're gonna make me too far, man. Uh, anyway, Rob. Yes. The game that I'm bringing. Let it
Roasting Descent
49:37
go. The game that I'm bringing is Descent. Descent. Which edition? The third one.
49:43
The newest Legend Legends of the Dark. So, before Rob put his selections in our chat,
49:48
you you had a bet, didn't you? I put into chat GBT, please roast a generic dungeon crawler.
49:55
Oh, nice. This is going to hurt. This is going to hurt. and literally just copied and pasted it in and all of the
50:05
That's how generic descent is that even chat GBT got hit every single note.
50:11
I'll get a descend into the pit of [ __ ] aren't we? Here we go. If you're here crying, it's not real.
50:16
Yeah, thanks AI. Nothing says an epic conclusion like alphabet alphabetizing cards and
50:21
re-backing tokens for 20 minutes. Yeah, that is true. That is true. You spend
50:27
150 quid on a game and then 150 quid more on having it organized.
50:34
Maybe not with that one. He keeps focusing on the organizing aspect. You finished the quest. The boss is
50:40
dead. And now for the Now for the finale. Spending 45 minutes packing it away. Yeah, that's true.
50:45
Yeah. Jesus Christ. So much time between turns. I thought this advertised as a dungeon crawler,
50:51
not a weight simulator. Not great, but it's true. Still a roast.
50:57
It's pretty much They run them like the um the sweat shops, don't you know? Like basically come around and play this ball
51:02
game with me. Everyone get Well, you're going to do this. You're going to get these pieces out. You're going to do this. And then put it back away.
51:09
Yeah. Yeah. We couldn't do if he didn't help me. We only played the game for half an hour.
51:15
The rogue is sneaky. The warrior hits things. The wizard is fragile. So revolutionary.
51:23
Same old tropes. Same old tropes. It is. Rob's just being quiet, isn't he? He just doesn't Yeah, he just sad.
51:30
I'm sad. But you say you didn't spend 150 quid on on Descent. But isn't that the one where you bought loads of binders to put all
51:36
of the tiles in? No, that was uh Oh, was that Oh, yeah.
51:42
Now it comes just with a big box that you throw it all in instead. Right. To be fair, the design solution for it. I know I'm supposed to be roasting it,
51:48
but that No, don't be nice about you. It's all 3D pieces.
51:56
So, isn't this the game where you have to have a phone to be able to play it as well, right? Yes.
52:01
Yeah. What's that about? It's going to be a board game. Yeah. Yeah. It's not going to make this, right?
52:08
He's defending it. I think we should shut his mic off. Yeah. I'm going to mute him.
52:14
I've muted him. I've muted him. You're going to roast it as well. I know.
52:19
He's just the one to do it. Um I have a problem with the fatigue tokens in descent because they look like baked
52:24
beans. They do. Tell me that they don't look like baked beans. Absolutely right.
52:30
Baked beans. I only need two beans. I need two beans. I need three beans cuz I've fatigued three beans worth of fatigue. So
52:37
there you go. Why? Why are they Why do they look that way? Bans. Is it maybe like drops of sweat?
52:43
I Yeah, I assume so. It's more tears again, isn't it? just leave the tears on off the ball game.
52:49
So, yeah, Descent Generic Dungeon Crawler. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No, that's fair. Yeah. Thanks for your input, Robert.
52:55
It's really helping to roast your game. Um, yeah. Thanks, mate.
Roasting Primal
53:00
Welcome. All right. Come back to you, Davey. Right. So, I'm putting onto the the dust
53:06
bin lid of roasting primal the awakening. So
53:12
this is difficult for me to roast cuz one I've not played it and two I've not played it. Two you've not played it and three I've not really seen much
53:19
about it. Yeah, it's it's fine. You can deliver the idea of a the concept of a roast now
53:24
for it and then in 5 years time you can actually deliver it just like Primal.
53:30
Nice. Gives you time to actually think about what you're putting in it and not just be like I've got a good idea for a
53:36
roast. That's what you can do. Is this the game of many boxes? Right. This is the game of many boxes. And I'm sure that's really helpful.
53:43
It's basically you you play a game and then you have to go find a box. The game
53:48
because you store it in in your office in the garden. In the garden and in the front room. So if we need a
53:53
piece from a different box, you have to literally travel to your house to get the box. It's too big to store in one room, Rob.
54:01
That's how big it is. Spread across the house. It's spread across the house. It is also the most blatant ripoff of an IP I think
54:08
I've ever seen. I was going to say, have you heard of Monster Hunter? Of course, I've heard of Monster Hunter. You heard of Monster Hunter? Yeah, it's that.
54:13
It might It might as well be called Hunter of Monsters: World Wild Rise because it's just that much of a direct
54:20
ripoff that I think that's you can get that close to calling it for a game. Does what Nemesis does to Aliens, right?
54:26
Yeah, I think I think it's closer. I think it's much more blatant. Yeah. Yeah. Even even like the weapons are pretty
54:34
much all there. Really? Yeah. Oh, wow. I mean to the names for egg. Guess what
54:39
he's got? He's got a hammer. Thor. Thor with the hammer. Yeah. Isn't it? Can't remember any of the other names
54:45
cuz I've not read any of the text. Mirad. The archer. I can't remember that, but
54:51
there are. Yeah, they've all got very generic monster huntery names. Yeah. Um, so yeah. Are they I mean, what about the bosses
54:57
themselves? Are they they cool? Are they just They're Monster Hunter bosses. Are they literally the same?
55:03
They're not literally the same. It's like, "Oh, there's a fox. It was a fire one in Monster Hunter. We've made it an
55:08
ice one for this game." Oh, really? [Laughter] Oh, that's [ __ ] That's not even
55:14
trying. That's not even trying. They know their IP, right? They They They know their IP
55:19
and they know how to not get sued for it. Yeah. Just just just enough. Yeah. But it's ice. It's not fire, is
55:26
it? This one's wind. It's like cassette beasts, right? Instead of pocket pocket monsters.
55:32
Wow, that's going back. Cassette Pokemon. Yeah, we all know that was where rather than
55:37
storing them storing them in a little ball, you stored them into onto cassettes. Cassette beasts.
55:43
Nice. No, good old Primal. Good old rip off of Pokémon. Yeah. I mean, I saw as how much plastic was in
55:50
Primal and I thought I might as well leave it. [ __ ] the Turtles. I don't give a [ __ ] about [ __ ] the Turtles.
55:55
[ __ ] the Turtles. Yeah, it's you know if you're going to if you're going to really [ __ ] the environment over with all of that plastic in that box, you
56:00
might as well sle your cards as well. You're doubling down. Absolutely. I would never I would never sleep so as
56:05
to be though. Yeah. All the environmentalists are
56:12
kicking off. I'm out to go and buy plastic straws after this as well. Yeah. Yeah. And um and cans of four with the
56:18
little plastic. Well, I've just spent nearly two weeks in America. I don't think our paper straws are really making a dent in the
56:24
environment to be honest. Sorry to mention it, but it's true. Like,
56:29
you know, we're separating all of our rubbish. Just goes in one big hole. They tried to get them to recycle once
56:35
and there was like nearly an uprising. I know. Separating my rubbish. Stop doing it.
56:41
So, yeah. Primal. Cool. Thanks, mate. No worries. No. Kick it off the bin.
56:47
Roasting tin. Off the bin or pedestal. You It would [ __ ] hurt if you kicked that off a bin. Yeah. Would kill a man.
56:53
You got You got to separate it first. Remember, right? Plastic goes in the plastic waste. Do you remember the height?
56:58
That's 90% of it. Do you remember the height of the bonfire in um the Dark Knight return the Dark Knight Rises that
57:04
the Joker sat on? Oh, yeah. It would be that it Well, you you can buy a separate box
57:09
just for all the cards. There's actually a box you can buy just to store all the cards in.
57:14
See, that that kind of makes sense, but it does make sense. It makes it easier cuz I think Paul This is a roast.
57:20
Yeah, we start to like it again. Oh, but we know it's That's cuz he's he he dragged me into
57:26
this. You dragged me into your optimism. Stop it. Rob, why am I on this episode? I quite like talking about things I like.
57:33
I'm a positive pink. I I am finding it difficult, I must admit. Yeah, it's why he's quiet.
Roasting Concordia
57:38
Yeah. Adrian, the king of beige brings you the king of beige. It's Concordia.
57:44
Concordia. Yeah. As exciting as the box cover makes it look, this is a board game that once you've
57:50
played it, you forgot you've played it instantly afterwards. It's so true. Why is that?
57:56
It's like that was really good. What did I play? What was that? What were we talking about? It's like the equalizer from Men
58:02
in Black somehow, but it's a board game. You're like, ding. Oh, yeah. What? 3 hours have gone by.
58:07
Need to have a good life and look after your women and do all this. And yeah, is it called the equalizer?
58:13
Neuralizer. Neuralizer. Thank you. I do think isn't the equalizer the guy who shoots people. That's Denzel Washington. That is Denzel Washington. Thank you.
58:19
He's not in Concordia. No, he's not in. No, it be more varied. It' make it more exciting if he was.
58:26
Let's face it. How many variations of of the Mediterranean do you need in a board game? Well, I own at least eight maps of
58:33
Are they all Mediterranean based? Well, yeah, they've all Well, no. One's England.
58:38
We'll pretend. One's sort of Germany. Okay. One's Cyprus, one's like the Med, one's Italy.
58:44
Yeah. One's Egypt. So, you know, there's a little variation in there.
58:49
Basically, all the borders just different colors. Yeah. Yeah. There's no definition of the map or anything. It's just colored blocks.
58:55
Well, no, cuz it doesn't matter what the map is cuz no one actually cares. Good. It's just Mediterranean Mediterranean
59:01
trading. You don't care what the map is. It's just area A, area B.
59:06
It reminded me. Tell me what's on the artwork of the cards as well. I can't remember. Is it just a white card? Yeah, it's just a white card, isn't it?
59:12
There's no background, nothing. Just white card. One of the consoles might have a picture of someone on it, but the artwork is
59:18
about as good as the front of the box, so you don't look at it. It's just text. You're just reading the text and going, "That's what it does."
59:24
More complex ticket to ride. Oh. Oh, nice. Solid stab there, Mr. R.
59:31
I know. I'm getting into it now. Yeah. Yeah. Ooh, that was a shank from the left. That was more complex ticket
59:37
to ride a night. Ticket to ride is more colorful. So
59:43
yeah, it's less pastely, isn't it? Yeah. So that is true. That is true. I mean, I I
59:48
never known a game where you play it and you don't know how well or or or you
59:54
know, how good you're doing in this game and you play for two hours and then realize it didn't really matter cuz you
1:00:00
never in the running anyway cuz you all sit on. So, you got a score track that you zero freaking point of that score track.
1:00:06
Oh, was this that game? Oh, yeah, it is, isn't it? Sorry, I forgot. Rob forgot it existed. I forgot
1:00:12
highlights it perfectly. So, you sit on zero all the way to the end and then you do endame scoring and then you move your
1:00:17
counter. Like, it's pointless. And the great thing is on the first play through, explaining that scoring is so
1:00:22
easy. It takes 20 minutes to explain the scoring and then everyone everyone
1:00:28
blanks out and then they get to the end and go, "What have I scored?" It's actually got the scoring on the card as well. You don't you can't you
1:00:33
don't read that. You don't see that. Why would you? Why would you? You just don't get it until you play that game once and go use white on white. It shouldn't all be
1:00:40
white, right? It's oddly hypnotizing. For a game that was set in the Mediterranean, it is very white.
1:00:47
The salt tokens are white. We haven't played with those yet. No, just it's just it's just everything in it. Just
1:00:53
the beige. And I mean, they updated the cover artwork cuz they took the piss out of
1:00:58
that so much. It's still bad though. And it's still boring. Like it's it's nice. They've done that intentionally,
1:01:04
but it's still boring. It's much nicer. Much nicer. Still boring. It would have been better if they put it through AI first. Oh, now
1:01:12
now you're on the fine. Actually getting offended now. Yeah. Like what? What? Don't think he
1:01:19
just said it. I don't believe it. But yeah, there we go. Cool. Well, from the Mediterranean.
Roasting Lisboa
1:01:25
Straight into Mediterranean. Straight into Portugal with my my game of Lisboa.
1:01:30
Liz Boa. It's kind of Yeah, Adrian actually really hates this game, so he's going to find this very easy. Um, which is why I
1:01:37
picked it. I thought you did. I picked it. I thought I'm going to see just bring it and I thought he'd enjoy this because I have to join I've joined you
1:01:45
and I have to go yes you are right Adrian this game is [ __ ] and even though every fiber of my being is say no
1:01:53
but there we go. So Lisb is on the offering table the sacrifice how you had to justify it. We were
1:01:59
having a go at Rob having to justify here and now you can't you have to build yourself up
1:02:04
to let go of Liz Bowen I have to I want you to take the first shot at this. Yeah,
1:02:10
I've got it. I've got it. Put the bin lid out the can of petrol. Come on. And then the match is going on, right?
1:02:17
My I will say I will say the queen and the three characters, you
1:02:23
know, on the left hand side, you got the queen, the president, and the master builder. The only things that aren't blue on the board. The only thing Yeah, the Cuz it's green,
1:02:29
red, and blue. So, it is blue. Um, they look weird as hell. They look really odd and like the
1:02:35
queen looks like a man. And you all took the piss out of me drawing for the battleground and I drew Liz Bow and you
1:02:41
went that guy that's that supposed to be the queen. So that's how she looks. Oh, he's taking the piss out of no tool. I love it.
1:02:46
Yeah. And it's it is weird, but maybe that's factually accurate. Maybe that's what they look like back in the day.
1:02:52
Maybe they look like weird squiggles. It is a bit strange. So yeah, there you go. There's the first little
1:02:58
I mean it leads perfectly onto how blue it is. It's very blue. Let's go for it. So I can't deny that it's blue.
1:03:03
It's far too blue. Somewhere is a landfill next to Eagle Griffin games just filled with ink cartridges that are
1:03:09
missing cyan. It's just half empty ink cartridges
1:03:15
where it's just yellow and magenta. Yeah. Just all there. No cion. That's true.
1:03:20
It's probably the opposite is they couldn't actually get hold of any of the other colors. So all they had was like
1:03:26
we've only got this one color in the printer. This is all you can use. You always run out of scion first. I feel like that's not accurate. It's the
1:03:33
most used color, isn't it? Yeah. It's what they probably overbought though, right? Well, they just bought They bought so much. So much refill for cyan. What are you
1:03:41
going to do now? Ian. Ian, please. Blue. Blue. Whatever you do, make it blue.
1:03:46
I'll set it in Lisbon. There's a lot of blue in Lisbon, so it's fine. Uh, yeah. It's very
1:03:52
This is one of the games that we could probably actually should play in the bath as well. Make it more thematic and
1:03:59
play it there again. Well, do you want some earthquakes? set it on fire and then shake the board a bit.
1:04:06
It It's kind of the rebuilding of the aftermath of all that. So maybe you should do all that and then try to replace the board game back
1:04:12
together. Where's the cardinal gone? He's disabled. Somehow the queen looks better. I mean, it would be a better game. So,
1:04:18
uh oh, dying. It's
1:04:24
It is Vitila's continued quest to make longer and longer menu player raids,
1:04:29
isn't it? Like it's just how much of an [ __ ] of a menu can I make out of this
1:04:36
because it's just what is it like seven pages of just text? A lot. It's just nothing there.
1:04:41
Yeah. It's really tiny as well. It kind of reminds me of going to like a real real pony restaurant where you sit
1:04:47
down and then suddenly they hand you a menu and go what would you like to order? Anything special from the menu in
1:04:53
but I'm sitting down playing a board game going the [ __ ] is this? Yeah. Number 73. 73. Uh, that tile is I
1:05:00
can't read the writing. It's far too small. I think it's that I think it's sweet and sour chicken.
1:05:08
Oh, he's giving me the wrong menu again. If Gordon Ramsay saw it, he would tell that menu to [ __ ] off. Let's face it,
1:05:14
cuz like he hates a long menu. He just be like, "Yeah, it's fucked."
1:05:20
Oh, come on. That's what he would say. But yeah, it is is probably I think it is the biggest
1:05:26
player raid out of the out of all of them. Yeah, it's just I think I think you're right.
1:05:31
It's his weird compulsion to make ridiculous player aids. And thankfully he put it on the worst
1:05:36
game so I don't ever have to you have to play it ever again. See, I've never played this game, but I
1:05:42
know how high like you you hold this game. Is it It's a worker placement game, right?
1:05:48
No. No. Is it not? If it was, it might be fun. It's it's basically
1:05:55
you you got a hand of cards, right? And you play the card in one of 75
1:06:00
different ways. Okay. So, why is there such a thematic backstory about rebuilding Lisbon? Cuz
1:06:05
that was the first thing you told me about this game. That's what it's about. That's what that's what they do with all the Eagle Griffin and Lera games is they
1:06:10
give you a backstory which makes no sense. It makes sense on its own and the game makes sense on its own and then
1:06:16
they push the two together and go, "I don't make sense at all." But enjoy. You've pieced this together like it's
1:06:21
better. Yeah. Yeah. And then you basically get a card and you go, I can put it in the top of my little board and it does something or
1:06:28
put it in the bottom of my board does something else or I can put it on the main board and it does something else. Yeah. Now I'm out.
1:06:34
Or I can do something else with it and I can get ships and I can do this and I can do that. Yeah.
1:06:39
It's where the name of the podcast as well, isn't it? Yeah. Whose turn is it anyway? Because that is a running theme
1:06:45
in this game because Oh, you're doing a follow on action. I'll follow you. Oh, I'll follow you. I'm doing my action. And then everyone
1:06:51
gets around the table and sometimes you go, who's going who's who's turn what?
1:06:57
It's very true. Happens almost every time cuz there's no kind of method. Well,
1:07:03
there's a methodical sequence, but it does get a bit It's meant to be this little player token that kind of says it's you. But if
1:07:10
someone's forgotten to put that out, which can happen, then you don't know. No one knows.
1:07:17
We might as well have not played. I'd love to roast it more, but honestly, I've purged all of the mechanisms and
1:07:23
actually how you play the game out of my brain, so all I'm left with is the vague sort of artwork and premise of it.
1:07:30
Did you play Concordia first? Yes, I did. I did. The men in black duralizer.
1:07:37
The men in beige. Yeah, the men in beige blasted you.
1:07:42
Here go. Here come the men in beige and blue. Board game defenders.
1:07:51
Anyway, any more? Any more Lisb thing? You're good. You feel bad. Sure. You got out of your system.
1:07:57
Yeah, you're good. There's more. But there's more. But he's just starting to get personal after that. Yeah.
Roasting The Witcher: Old World
1:08:03
So, Rob, yes. Your last offering generic dungeon
1:08:08
to roast games that I love. Um, let me guess. It's fantasy based. Is it? It is.
1:08:13
Yeah. Shock. Is it a dungeon crawler? Is it? It's not. No.
1:08:18
He's finally crawled out of the dungeon crawler. Spice it up a little bit. Um, with
1:08:24
the Witcher. So, if I understand it correctly with this game, the cat witches are sneaky.
1:08:31
The bear witches hit things. The viper witch the viper witches are fragile. So, it's like revolutionary gameplay
1:08:37
just like all of the I missed the mark on that one. A I I feel like I I feel like I have to defend
1:08:43
it. Weird. I know I don't. I know I don't. I know I don't. It was ridiculously
1:08:49
overpriced, but it was beautifully made. So, you know, but it is the game of Right. You take
1:08:54
your turn, Rob. Yeah. Cool. Um I'll go and get a Yeah, I'll go and get a cup of tea and
1:09:00
I'll do the washing and then your turn's Oh, you need me to read some text out for you? Okay, I'll read the text out
1:09:05
for you. What do you want to do? Do you want to do this or do you want to do that? I want to do that. Cool. Are you finished yet? No, because I got to get some cards and that might depend on what
1:09:12
you're Okay, cool. Um, so 50 minutes later, I get to have a go. Nice.
1:09:17
Yeah, they've released Gwent, so you can play Gwent on the side now. Yeah, you can have a side hustle of
1:09:22
Gwent while you're waiting for your turn in the Witch of the Odd World. I mean, it's like you're actually in the Witcher world, right? So, when you sit down and
1:09:29
you play Gwent while you're out adventuring, they should have released them together like it was a companion thing. And yeah,
1:09:35
that could have been you have a little game of Gwent on the side. Yeah. You can get cards from different people and Oh, see we made this game
1:09:41
better already. I don't know why they said up to five players. Like that would that would take two days.
1:09:46
I won't I would not play this game. Probably more than two. No, it's it's ridiculous how how long it can
1:09:53
be. You need a table and wheels so you can go out actually adventuring while you're playing. Right. This is the game Curley played at a
1:09:59
convention and got up and left. Yeah, he did. He did not want to play this game
1:10:05
anymore. Taking too long. Yeah, we that was when we tried it at four player, wasn't it? And it's like, nope.
1:10:10
I'm not doing it. He just said, "I can't do this anymore and I'm leaving. Thank you very much and goodbye."
1:10:15
This does feel like the Liam Hemsworth of Witcher board games. Like it's it's kind of
1:10:21
Oh, when you want to play The Witcher, but this is all you've got on hand, you can play this.
1:10:27
Witcher from Wish. It's better. Au Witcher. T-u Witcher.
1:10:34
Where's Geralt though? He's not even in it, is he? No, cuz it's it's set a thousand years before that point. Oh, why?
1:10:40
It's so they could finish it by the time Gail turns. It's very thematic.
1:10:45
It's very thematic. I think it suffers from the primal thing though with the oh, I need to go and
1:10:51
find that that monster and right where in the box is monster. Where is it? The difference is in this game you have
1:10:57
time between turns to go and get That's true. You can do all of the admin, can't you? It doesn't really matter cuz we're we're still deciding on
1:11:04
what we're doing and what's going on. It's called the watcher.
1:11:10
The watcher. The old world. It is the old world. We're very old. It's the reason why I haven't got to the
1:11:16
table anywhere near as much as I should have is cuz you need a good six hours for that first game. You said it's a weekend
1:11:22
playing solo. Yeah. It's the perfect game for four people to sit down and watch one person play the
1:11:27
game. Yeah. Just at different times. Yeah. Just like a movie. Oh, you mean just like the movie? No, it's just like a
1:11:34
movie. You get to watch it. It's just like a movie being made.
1:11:41
It takes years and and you kind of get to see the end. It's like It's like a James Cameron film, isn't it? That's what it is.
1:11:47
You know, my favorite bit about this game being sarcastic is that you're getting into it and you're like, "Yeah, I'm getting into I'm
1:11:53
like trailing this monster and I've got some information duh." And then someone else goes, "Yeah, I've got this uh
1:11:59
whatever it is, the victory points in the game. I've got the last one. I've done I've won." Everything stops. And you're like, "What? I was just I've just
1:12:06
got this quest to go." It don't matter. The game's over. I've got the quest on the north and I've nearly got this the Manta core over there. Don't matter.
1:12:13
It's over, JP. I'm the best Witcher. Just I'm the best Witcher and the game's over. Yeah, but doesn't matter. But it's only turn one and you've been
1:12:19
playing 4 hours. I haven't had my go yet. What's going on? So yeah, that's the
1:12:25
best bit when it just ends suddenly and you're suddenly jolted out of this world
1:12:30
into Rob's living room and uh and you go, "Oh, so it's over then and it's time to go home in 7 hours when we pack it
1:12:37
all away." Yeah, cuz there's so much to it, isn't there? There's a lot. There's quite a bit. Don't tell me you're not daunted when
1:12:43
you set that game up. Not anymore. Really? Yeah. Let me Hold on. Let me pull that one out
1:12:48
from before then. So, um, nothing says epic con conclusion like alphabeting item cards and rebagging tokens for 20
1:12:55
minutes. No, there's no tokens. [Music] Boom.
1:13:00
Yeah. Taking corn. [ __ ] Ling. There is. There is. There is.
1:13:06
There is tokens. There's not loads, but there is. There we go. There. There's our little roast. Um, of course, we
1:13:12
actually really like these games. Yeah, we do. Well, apart from some of us liking not liking others as Adrian has
1:13:18
very much a dungeon craers. You're right. Yeah, he hates Descent and um so but
1:13:24
yeah, generally we really like it. We just thought it'd be a bit of fun to take the piss out of them because the our board game hobby is weird at times
1:13:31
and we do put up with a lot of weird stuff in our hobby and when we buy games and we really enjoy them and really love
1:13:37
them, we kind of overextend our love and cover some of the faults in them as
1:13:43
well. Right. you find you do when you like something, you go, "Yeah, I know it's a bit bit quirky, but I love it, so
1:13:48
it doesn't matter. I like it because it's weird." It's when someone goes, "Oh, it's really abstracted." And you go, "Yes, all board games are, but I love this one, so it
1:13:55
feels less abstracted than your one." Also, I didn't realize how defensive I was was of the games that I like before
1:14:01
this episode. I was like, "Oh, that that's really annoying me. This is the closest I get to football tribalism, you
1:14:07
know." So yeah, you you kind of get used to hearing
1:14:14
people's opinions in board gaming though. That's one things people we all say, "Oh, I don't like that ball game or
1:14:19
I'm not going to play that." And it's quite nice. It used to bother me. It used to when I first started it used
1:14:26
to bother me. Yeah. But it's it's quite nice. It's free doing it to your own games. Even though,
1:14:32
as you were saying, we do kind of have rose tinted glasses with some of them. We do. And I don't believe in half the
1:14:37
stuff I've said about a lot of them now. Me neither. It's just it's good laugh, wasn't it? I meant all of it.
1:14:43
Yeah. No one doubts that. I meant everything I said. Until I met Adrian. I used to hate it when people said their opinion about
1:14:49
board games. Desensitized everyone. I think I think but it's important for
1:14:55
let you know let people have their say and and it's that's all it is. It's an opinion. That's the point. If it brings
1:15:01
someone joy and they like it, then let them like it. Just because I don't like it, it doesn't matter.
1:15:07
Yeah. You know. Yeah. Exactly. That's And that's why it's like let people say what they want to about a game because if you love it,
1:15:12
you love it. You love it, you love it. If you don't, you don't. Who cares? I love other people's opinions. Don't don't do it.
1:15:19
Don't remember that. Agree with you. Remember that, Rob. Next time you're playing a generic dungeon crawler,
1:15:24
I will. Nice. When you're packing it away, you'll have a couple of hours to
1:15:30
ruminate. The thing is, I bet you've got way harder games to pack away than mine.
1:15:35
Oh, I don't. I have void fall. Yeah. Yeah. I don't over void fall. That's the worst. I don't think so. Now, actually, void
1:15:41
fall packing away is easier. Setting up is twice as worse. So, yeah. There we There we go. That's our race. Let's move on to the next
TURN 4 - Receive, Sleeve or Leave
1:15:47
segment.
1:15:58
Okay, now it's time for some receive, leave, or leave. And I've picked Jewel games today.
1:16:05
Only two. Only two. Yeah. What are we going to do with the third one? No. Three, Davey. Three. So, I've picked
1:16:12
uh Seven Wonders Jewel in homage to Rob playing it in Memphis. Um I've picked
1:16:19
Jaipur. If you've played Jaipur um and Radlands, which is I've not played Radland.
1:16:25
Oh, have you not? I've only played Radlands. Oh, there we go. But you kind of know what Seven is about.
1:16:30
And I know what Japo is. You know what Jaipur is about? Yeah. Do you Rob? Camels. N camels and kind of trading with little
1:16:38
kind of pokery chip things. Are they poker chips? I've never played it online. Yeah.
1:16:43
On BGA. So Yeah. Little plastic chips. Did you know camels can eat cactus? Cacti.
1:16:48
Yes, they can. without damaging their mouth. They got little like flesh
1:16:55
face. Thanks for the camel facts. Okay, so
1:17:00
there you go. They're the games. So, who wants to jump in? Who's going to give me their
1:17:05
Yeah. So, I'm going to sleeve Japur. Yeah. Um mainly because I've never played it
1:17:12
and I want to play it. So, and I've heard it's really good, right? It's classic. It's very good. Um, I'm going to leave
1:17:21
um Seven Wonders Jewel because I think uh Lord of the Rings is better. Yeah. Okay, that was my feeling. First thought.
1:17:27
Um, and I'm going to receive Radlands because it's a good game. It's good one
1:17:32
v one jeweler. Um, what does it remind me of? I'm trying to think what it reminds me of.
1:17:39
There is a game it reminds me of and I can't remember what, but there's a video game version of it. Sorry.
1:17:45
Badlands. Badlands. Yeah. I don't know what it is. No. Um Rust. I think it I think it actually reminds
1:17:52
me slightly of Hearthstone. Um Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Cuz you have one base. Oh, as in like the actual gameplay. I
1:17:58
thought you were talking about No, no, not the team. No, no, the actual gameplay kind of reminds me of Max, isn't it kind of stuff?
1:18:04
But it kind of reminds me of Halfstone, but in a uh board game sense. So, yeah. Enjoy it.
1:18:10
Good. All right. Cool. About you, Rob? Uh, for me, I would leave Jaipur.
1:18:15
All right. Because I don't know what it is. Uh, I would sleeve Radlands. Yeah, I really enjoyed that. And I would
1:18:22
receive Seven Wonders Jewel. I actually prefer it to uh than Lord of the Rings.
1:18:27
Why do you prefer it then? I'm interested by this. Why do you prefer it? Uh, I think there's a sense of urgency
1:18:35
in the Lord of the Rings jewel because of the the chasing thematic and the
1:18:41
you're kind of racing against the other person, which is probably the same in Seven Wonders Jewel, but it didn't feel
1:18:46
like it. Little bit of stressed out playing Seven Wonders Jewel. Yeah. And um and and the wonders were
1:18:52
cool and and like it's basically the same game, right? But I and you didn't have the um there wasn't as much to keep
1:18:59
an eye on. like you don't have the waring section with the map. You didn't have the Frodo chasing the ring. Um, so
1:19:06
for me simplifying it actually made it more enjoyable. I know probably if you
1:19:11
if you played it a lot, I can see why Lord of the Rings would probably it would kind of tip then if you've played
1:19:17
it a lot, but um yeah, for me I I really enjoyed it. Yeah. And I kicked your ass at it, which
1:19:22
certainly helps. All right. Didn't need to mention that bit, did you? You're roasting JP now. Yeah.
1:19:29
Sorry. Like you said, it's a habit that you It's like when you start doing an accent, you can't stop for a while, can you?
1:19:35
I'm going to break the rules like everyone did last episode. I don't That's That's naughty. That was naughty.
1:19:40
That was naughty. I'm going to put Seven Wonders jewel in the bin. Yeah, because Lord of the Rings exists and to
1:19:47
me that is the better. But again, that's fine. I've sort of seems like it's like a two/3 oneird split. There's a third that
1:19:53
still love the original Seven Wonders Jewel out of people I've spoken to and about twothirds of people for the Lord of the Rings.
1:19:59
So, I'm finding it quite interesting as to why and what and all that kind of stuff. That's why I picked the the original for
1:20:05
this, not the new one. So, just do it because that other one exists. I'm going to put that one in the bin, which is cheating a little bit, I think. But I
1:20:11
don't think so. And then, um I am going to receive uh
1:20:17
Radlands because I've not played it. I've seen bits of it. I kind of get the gist of what it's trying to do.
1:20:22
Um, so I'll receive that and so I will sleeve Jaipur because it's a fun game.
1:20:29
Yeah, fair. Kind of does what it needs to. Yeah, fair enough. Camels, talk to me. Got to talk to me carews, mate.
1:20:35
You JP, I'm going to sleeve Radlands. Um, mainly because it needs to. I've got Radlands
1:20:41
and I've worn it out. Oh, so it needs slee and me and Josh play it, my son. So
1:20:47
that's not how this game works. No, no, but but I'm going to basically as if I was getting it all again, obvious leave
1:20:53
Radlands. It's it's a special little game. Me and Josh played a lot of it. Um we haven't played it for a long time, but
1:20:58
I do like it. So that leave Jaipur and Seven Wonders. I would
1:21:04
probably receive Jaipur cuz when I played it, it surprised me. Yeah, it surprised me how much fun I had with
1:21:10
that game and I'd play it again. I enjoyed watching you play on the stream. It was good fun. It was good fun. So, I'd probably
1:21:16
receive that and Seven Wonders I would leave mainly because it's not the other two. Fair enough.
1:21:23
That's it. But I still would play any of them. But there we go. [Music]
TURN 5 - Penultimate Turn: What's Coming Up
1:21:34
And now it's time for our penultimate turn where we talk about all things coming up that's exciting ball game
1:21:40
related or not. So, uh, yeah. Anyone got any good looking forward to stuff coming
1:21:46
up? Yeah, I'll go first. Oh, Davey. I had a nice overly produced board game
1:21:51
arrive. Oh, I know what you're talking about. I had Roth arrive and my god, it's
1:21:56
beautiful. It's so nice. Got the neoprene mat out. It's just it's so neon
1:22:03
and yeah, the vibe of it is just great. So, packed that away. Got have the two
1:22:09
expansions. They fit in the box as well, which is always nice. Appreciated. It's appreciated.
1:22:15
Um, and the metal pieces. I don't even think I back the metal pieces, but I I've got the metal pieces.
1:22:21
So, um, I just I remember them saying, "Oh, these are the extra pieces." And I think to start with, they were just
1:22:26
meant to be like just um just molded molded niceness.
1:22:31
Um, the ones I played were uh UKG were plastic ones. Were plastic. Yeah. So, there might be
1:22:38
those plastic. I think those were meant to be the nice pieces and the normal pieces were meant to be the just like um
1:22:43
cubes and then they just suddenly just went, "Oh, we're going to do diecast metal for those nicer pieces." So, and
1:22:50
they're really really nice. Um yeah, so I'm kind of looking forward to
1:22:55
getting that to the table. Um probably get a couple games in in an evening, but yeah, of just rolling dice and yeah, you you
1:23:03
when you were playing at UKG, it looks like you guys were really enjoying it. So, um, yeah, I think, um,
1:23:09
I'm strangely intrigued by this one. I didn't think I would be, and the more I've seen of it, I'm like, I might have to try that. Give it a go.
1:23:14
I just love the fact it's an hour long. Like, that's usually the downside to wargaming as such, isn't it?
1:23:19
Yeah. It's just Well, um, dudes on a map game. Dudes on the map. Yeah. Yeah. And the fact that you can you can blast through
1:23:26
it. It's an hour. So, you kind of think, who gives a [ __ ] And you have that mentality where where you kind of play
1:23:32
and you'll do stuff that's more riskier because you think me I'll play again in
1:23:37
40 minutes. Yeah. And then just go again and do something else. It's I think that's its strength. I think it's going to be one I'm going
1:23:43
to take to cons to be like oh what should we play now? Oh we're just bit rough. Jump in. Have a bit
1:23:49
bit of rough for the lads. Yeah. Yeah. That's it. Rough for the lads. Rough for the boys.
1:23:54
Rough for the boys and girls and girls. All right. Cool. I'm looking forward to that. Let's get my rough off. Let's get
1:24:00
your rough off. What about you, Rob? So, uh, I got a call from Mr. Currington
1:24:06
saying, "Can you come around and and um help unbox and set up um
1:24:12
Elder Scrolls?" I love how he has to have second person there to It's like what we were talking about earlier. It's like a sweat shop. Oh,
1:24:19
what what dungeon craw are we playing today? It's amazing. It starts when you unbox it. So yeah,
1:24:24
I'm going over to his to help him kind of set up and and start a campaign um going again. So really looking
1:24:31
forward to playing again, so it should be good. Nice. I love Elder Scrolls and I love Too Many Bones and it's like they had a baby, so
1:24:38
it's good for me. Yeah, sounds cool. Uh I'm just generally looking forward to
1:24:44
some uh holidays. That's generally holiday. I'm just looking forward to
1:24:49
that. I'll be honest. Um, I haven't got that many games coming up, uh, because it's only a couple of weeks away. Uh,
1:24:56
but we got stuff in the diary. I've started putting some more game events up as well afterwards, which is cool. Um,
1:25:02
but yeah, I just my main focus is get on holiday, play some games. I have bought
1:25:08
Flip 7. Nice. Cuz Becky talked about it on previous episodes or last two or three episodes
1:25:15
ago, and I thought, yeah, I think that would be quite fun. Plays up to eight people. It's getting a lot of love. It's getting a lot of love. It's quick.
1:25:21
It's pushy look. And I thought, nah, why not? It's like a tenner. So, I bought that to to take with us. And uh yeah,
1:25:29
just looking forward. I think me and Rob cuz me and Rob, we're going together. Um but we uh probably going to jump back
1:25:36
into the undaunted stling grad. Yeah. We started and then stopped for a while.
1:25:41
So, we're going to try and get that one moving again. Yes. So, that'd be good fun. That' be good. It would be nice to get it finished cuz
1:25:47
it's one of those games that oddly I don't look forward to playing it. But when we play it, I bloody love it.
1:25:54
Great. Do you know what I mean? It almost like you're like, "Oh, okay." Like I I've enjoyed it so far and just every time
1:26:00
I've played it, I've loved it. I love the legacy aspect of what that game's doing. But I I agree. It's kind of like I've got to play a World War II
1:26:06
game. It's got no hype. Yeah. You can't get excited about playing it, but every time we play it, I love it.
1:26:11
What are we four missions in? Something like that. I think we're more than that. before five. Yeah, it all I know is that
1:26:17
most of my squad is decimated and I've just got the chaff. I literally all the reserves in and I look at all my cards
1:26:23
just people with spades. I'm like what am I going to do with spades? Like you got guns, man. You keep bloody bombing
1:26:30
me with that [ __ ] airplane. Every time that every time they're like, "Get the airplane." So he's German.
1:26:36
I was going to say if he's bombing with planes, he's got German. I'm Russia. Um so yeah, but it's cool. It's It's cool.
1:26:42
I I would say when we're finished with it, if anyone wants to kind of play through it and borrow it or have it or whatever, I'm more than happy to to kind
1:26:48
of pass it along. I think if you like Undaunted, you should because we're in a villa, obviously. It's not like we're going to the pub
1:26:55
like we we're going to have evenings to do it. And you you can easily get two or three in an evening depending on how,
1:27:02
you know, how how dug in you want to be about a mission. Um, and the fact that, you know, we're going away for a couple
1:27:08
of weeks gives the perfect opportunity. A few blitz few more missions. opportunity to do it. So, so yeah. Um,
1:27:15
looking forward to that. That's the plan. Yeah. How about you, Adrian? Yeah, I've got a few games coming up,
1:27:20
but they're all sort of ones we talked about before. So, like got Apex coming up. Looking forward to that. That'll be
1:27:26
good. Thought about that. Um, I have, however, also raided the Steam sale. So, on the
1:27:32
What' you get? I bought a load of games that I've looked at and then eventually gone, nah, it's too much, whatever. So, I bought
1:27:37
Guardians of the Galaxy, which is what I'm playing through at the moment. That was That's pretty good. There's really
1:27:42
good game. There's one mechanic in it that I do not like, which is when all the it's the huddle up and all the words come on the
1:27:48
screen and you've got to select an option. Yes. That basically there's two words on the screen and you look for the option has
1:27:54
one of the two words in it and you click that and you get better bonuses for clicking the right option. And it's like
1:28:00
I I I feel like this was more of a mechanic and then it went through play
1:28:06
testing or whatever and they went n it's not really they trimmed it back trimmed it back or something because it's just so unnecessary when everything
1:28:11
else feels like good and useful and the way the squad mechanics works is all fun and then just the weird huddle up
1:28:18
mechanic it's like either just make it two buttons or make it a more difficult thing to do. Yeah, it's just so
1:28:25
But I've got that. Then next will be Hogwarts Legacy and then I've got the two Shadow of Mordor and the other one
1:28:32
cuz I never I never played I never played them the first time round and I got all of that for less than 20 quid I
1:28:38
think it was. Yeah. Nice. Yeah. So it might have been just over 20 quid, but yeah, I prefer Shadow of Mordor to Shadow of
1:28:45
War. Yeah. But they're both brilliant and that mechanic in them I know they
1:28:50
patterned it. the Nemesis system. Yeah, it's it works so well and it's a
1:28:56
shame that more games can't take advantage of that sort of system. It's like I remember you. Oh, it's that
1:29:02
little [ __ ] that killed me. Now he's got promoted and oh going to kill you lally make a beline for this guy and you
1:29:07
murder him and it's great. So, so yeah. So, I've got three games that again they're all a little bit older at this point. They're all a
1:29:13
couple of years old at least. But I've heard I heard good things. I just didn't want to pay full price. And I think Guardians was like five quid.
1:29:19
Yeah. I think Hogwarts Legacy was like8 or N pound something like that and I think the two together was like 15 quid
1:29:26
maybe I can't remember now but it was just like I remember just looking at it going that's a lot of gaming I can get in for very little money.
1:29:33
So with no hobby space in that setup that's kind of what I'm doing at the moment is playing more games.
1:29:39
Yeah, I've been on the old computer game hype as well. Ghost of Sashima. Yeah, that's really good.
1:29:45
Talked about that a bit. Yeah, it's such a beautiful game. It looks lovely, but it's Dark Souls.
1:29:50
It's not Dark It's loads easier than Dark Souls. It's kind of more It feels more like a Ubisoft game, but not an
1:29:55
Ubisoft game. So, it's good um with the open world. I mean, deserved. Yeah.
1:30:01
Um and it's like the combat's really fluid and the like the sword animations
1:30:09
and everything look amazing. Chopping people's arms off and stuff and them then getting scared and terrified.
1:30:15
It all just flows. terrified. I've got no arms cuz I've chopped them off with my
1:30:21
blade. Yeah. Yeah. It's It's just really fun. It's really good. Recommend it. Good stuff. Well, it's always good to do
1:30:26
a bit of video gaming stuff every now. So, you've got some board games on there just on we talked about recently. Yeah.
TURN 6 - The Final Turn
1:30:32
Yeah. Fair enough. Cool. Well, I think that about wraps it up, guys. Um this is my kind of last episode of my run and
1:30:38
I'm handing over to good friend Adrian. Good friend. Good friend. Been upgraded.
1:30:43
Been upgraded. Um so, yeah. Yeah. So, Adrian, you're going to be taking over as first player with some ideas and
1:30:49
stuff that I didn't even know what he's going to talk about yet. So, hopefully good stuff. Hopefully good fun things. Yeah. So,
1:30:55
that about wraps it up. So, uh thanks for listening. Uh as always, uh we, you know, appreciate all your support. If
1:31:01
you like the show, please like, subscribe, and share with uh anyone that you like, your friends, your gaming
1:31:08
group, your family, who knows, anyone who likes listening to us. If you've enjoyed the show and you want to support us, please uh go on to our site on
1:31:15
coffee and uh throw us a few pennies. It all helps towards the the running of the show and keeps this uh show alive. So
1:31:21
yeah, we always appreciate that and we thank everyone who's currently doing it. You're all awesome. Um toss a coin to your podcast.
1:31:27
Toss a coin to your podcast and we love it. There you go. Um yeah, all that's left
1:31:34
to say is whose turn is it anyway?
1:31:40
[Music]